Pouring My Heart Out to You

Wow it has been a long time since I’ve written on here but it is definitely something to do when one is up at 1 am. It is crazy to think how fast 2010 has just passed us by and now a new year and is upon us. This year has been filled with joy and filled with pain, but in the midst of it all God prevailed.

I’ve never had a year or even a semester as rocky as the one I just had. But despite the tears, the frustration, the anger, the disappointment…God was still there.

It was not until 2010 that I realized what God truly wanted for me and that I had to stop trying to help others just for a moment and fix me…this was not an easy task to even try to do because of the pride and the denial that I would have a problem…but I did and it just took me a while to realize it. God knew I’d come around He just patiently waited with His arms open and waiting for His daughter to find herself and her purpose again…

As I write this, I’m listening to the song “Secrets” by OneRepublic and it says, “I’m gonna give all my secrets away…” It was this year that I finally realized that even though I thought I could hide my secrets from God, I couldn’t…I laid everything down because I was at a breaking point where only He could help me. Was it easy? Of course not…I was shaking and crying so hard as I put my pride aside, grabbed his hand and said “Here’s everything…I trust you”.

As I look to 2011 I’m overjoyed with what God has in store. Will it be easy? Probably not but I know that God will be there through the ups and downs in my life like he has been for the past 23 years and that brings me peace and joy that only He can bring. I still have a lot of healing and learning to do as I move on but I know that I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me!

As you look to 2011 what are the “secrets” holding you back from doing what you really want to do or who you really want to be? Don’t let them weigh you down! God can take them from you and bring a joy that is beyond all other. He took mine…he can take yours too…what are you waiting for…